This week there's been a lot going on with Twitter and a couple of conferences (Radfem2012 and Intersection) where debates have centred around definitions of women only space.
It seems to be a mine field that I'm loath to step into but I do have some thoughts and some feelings about this issue. I do not have a single position, so if you're here to know where I stand on this you might find this a frustrating read.

I think that trans people are probably amongst the most rejected, systematically oppressed and misunderstood groups of people in the western world at the moment.  I think that growing up knowing that you are in the wrong body and having to deal with that on a daily basis is a substantially different life experience to mine.
Sometimes I feel uncomfortable that we try and use the same word to describe who we are as gendered adults, because of this substantial difference in life experience.
I think that feminism is political, it's about overthrowing the patriarchy. I think that all people have a part to play in achieving this end. I think all who agree with feminism and want to work towards the end of patriarchy should do so. I think our roles may well be different in the fight. I think that we have to work together or it'll never happen.
I feel confused about the current debate being all about oppression and exclusion and I also feel I agree that women raised as girls may well want to meet together and claim some space. Being raised as a girl is different. I do feel that it really is that different.
I hope I would feel very welcoming of straight women feminists who wanted to meet without lesbians on the basis that their daily lives are very different and have radically different experiences of working out feminism and patriarchy in day to day life. I wouldn't feel that they hated me or had a phobia of me, although I'm certain I'd feel a bit hurt and rejected as the door closed.

I remember organising women only lesbian discos in the late 80's and my best friend feeling hurt that I wanted to do something he was excluded from because he had a willy. I remember standing at the door of said disco physically stopping a large rasta guy from coming in. He tried to convince me it was all cool because he was oppressed too and therefore understood perfectly.

I spent most of the mid to late 80's being accused of not being a "Proper Lesbian" because I enjoyed the couple of sexual encounters I had with men. 

I have generally avoided women who identify as Radical Feminists cos they have scared the bejeezus out of me in the past.

I feel some admiration for any trans woman who wants to go to a Radical Feminist conference. I think you're pretty brave, and must be an interesting person. I feel relieved that there is such a rich diversity of feminists emerging in the UK. I feel humbled and naive and perhaps a little ashamed that I'm surprised by this.

I've been accused on twitter of being deliberately ignorant. I don't think I am. I try to be deliberately kind. I work hard to understand a situation from everyone's view point and I'm really comfortable to hold more than one opinion, feeling and thought even if they are opposing. The more emotive a topic is, the more complicated it becomes, the more pressure there is to 'pick a side'. 

Meanwhile, the patriarchy is fit and well and living all around us.

I know, it's an odd title, but these things happen when you're working in the sexual health field, even if you haven't actually used one of the things since you were 18, you can still end up with one in your coat pocket after a Gala and it falls out, only to be discovered months later in the bottom of the cat litter tray. True story.